Crime

My mother was a prostitute

My father was a thief

My auntie ran a brothel

It gave cheap relief

Crime, crime

Crime doesn't pay



And my sister worked in peep shows

Carrots between cheeks

My brother pimped for call girls

Fostered their deceits

Crime, crime doesn't pay

Except when the debt collector needs to be paid



My nephew was a rent boy

Dress-sense made me weep

And my niece clipped in Soho

Her lies defied belief

Crime, crime, crime doesn't pay

Except when the debt collector needs to be paid

Crime, crime, crime doesn't pay